Is it really LOVE?
Why do we, as women, take on so much? Why do we put ourselves through so much stress, overloading ourselves? What are we trying to prove? And more importantly, what are we trying to teach our children—especially our daughters?
At what point, are we going to stop and pay attention to what we are putting our loved ones and ourselves through?
I bet if asked, we would say, “I am doing all of this because of those I love.” Are we?
Looking back, what I came to recognize is that more I had on my plate, more stressed I was and less time and patience I had for those I loved and of course no time for myself.
It took me a long time to recognize that I do not have to be perfect in everything at all times. And, even longer to learn how to pull myself out of the destructive cycle of knowing it all, doing it all and being it all.
A Perfect Woman, A Perfect Mom
I guess I was just trying to live up to the “perfect mom/perfect woman” image that I had grown up with and bought into—the image that the society has created for us as women—regardless the culture. We watch our mothers and the image that is portrayed of the perfect woman; success at work and home, dressed in designer clothes with perfect hair and make up, and of course always smiling supporting her partner and taking care of her children. Seriously, we know this is not true and we still fall for it.
…You did What?
I vividly remember the day that I broke down, crying hysterically in the car when stopped by the same officer for the second time, on the same road and within thirty minutes (yes! In one day).
You see, when stopped the second time, I was not trying to get out of a ticket. I was so overwhelmed by all I had to deal with, that I just gave in—I lost control of me—I could not handle it any more. “A failure—how would you not see the stop sign or not know the speed limit?” I was supposed to be perfect—following all rules and knowing it all.
You think that experience would be a wake up call—not really—but realization came at higher expense several years later.
Have You Asked Yourself “Why”?
Looking back at those days, I keep asking myself, how did I get through that time of my life, and why would I do that to my family and myself. Oh well, I know better now! That is why I started heal the heart and am writing these blogs. If I can even help one woman, one person to recognize that driving yourself and your family crazy really does not worth it. That stress you’re causing yourself and those you love, is really steeling precious time away from all of you, and that at the end it really does not matter. What matters is the time you spent with those who love you, enjoying and experiencing every moment fully. Those are the stories you will enjoy telling, not the ones about being stopped twice in one day because you were overly stressed and insane.
Love And Be Loved
If you are a woman and/or mom, buying into this perfect woman stuff, please stop! One, because perfection is a mirage, two, because you will drive yourself and those you love crazy. And three, you may end up resenting everything and everyone you are trying to do all of this for—those who you love and love you for YOU!
Aazam Irilian, is an artist with a mission to heal and the founder of heal the heart. She is a Transformation coach and helps others to uncover their blocks and overcome life challenges in order to move forward in life, personally and professionally.Her process of combining visualization and creativity, allows participants to relax and clear their mind, in order to identify solutions toward achieving best result for personal and professional growth.
To learn more visit healtheheart.com
Upcoming workshops: http://www.healtheheart.com/upcoming-events-1